500+ Funny Things to Comment on Instagram

Friendly Roasts

• "This pic just crashed Instagram's servers 🔥"
• "Excuse me, this level of beauty should be illegal"
• "I showed this to my plants and now they're growing faster"
• "NASA called, they can see your glow from space"
• "This energy could power a small city"
• "Main character energy detected 📈"
• "The algorithm is shaking"
• "Serving looks and destroying lives"

Savage Mode

• "Which filter is carrying this team?"
• "Your camera roll: 📸📸📸📸📸 This one: 📸"
• "The 47 rejected selfies are crying rn"
• "This angle doing more work than you at the gym"
• "Even FaceTune said 'good luck'"
• "Your confidence is writing checks your pixels can't cash"
• "This pic has more layers than an onion"
• "The lighting is doing charity work here"

Supportive Humor

• "Meanwhile I got winded opening this app"
• "This is why I keep you around - motivation from my couch"
• "Your gym membership is getting its money's worth"
• "Muscles loading... 99% complete"
• "Weird flex but okay (literally)"
• "The gym's favorite child"
• "Making the rest of us look like potatoes"
• "This is your sign to skip leg day"

Playful Roasts

• "The gym bathroom mirror's favorite customer"
• "How many gym selfies until you get abs?"
• "Your personality needs this workout too"
• "Plot twist: This is the parking lot"
• "Same gym outfit since 2019, respect"
• "The weights are just props at this point"
• "January 1st energy in December"
• "This is the 'before' picture, right?"

Playful Teasing

• "Which one of you lost a bet?"
• "Hostage situation or relationship?"
• "Someone check if they're blinking SOS"
• "This is why I have trust issues"
• "Happy 3-month anniversary again"
• "Who forced who into this photo?"
• "The Notebook called, they want their scene back"
• "PDA police have been notified"

The Exaggeration

Take something small and blow it up:

• • "This [thing] could solve world hunger"
• • "NASA called about [observation]"
• • "[Subject] found dead in a ditch"
• • "The UN wants to discuss this [thing]"

The Comparison

Compare to something unexpected:

• • "This has more [X] than [Y]"
• • "Looking like a [random thing]"
• • "[Thing] wants their [thing] back"
• • "This is giving [vibe] energy"

The Self-Deprecation

Make it about your reaction:

• • "Meanwhile I'm [doing less impressive thing]"
• • "This is why I [self-roast]"
• • "My [thing] could never"
• • "And I'm over here [struggling]"

The Pop Culture

Reference current trends:

• • "[Celebrity] is shaking"
• • "This is giving [TV show] vibes"
• • "[Movie quote] but make it fashion"
• • "Tell me you're [X] without telling me"